Baby steps back into training
Hello again friends and family. I said that I need to take some time off after the devastating (comlete shock as I had ring plans,as some of you knew,within 4 weeks) life changing news I had received from my ex about a month ago. And yes I needed that time and I’ll need time still I’m sure. However, now I have to start doing things again and that means, it’s time to get back on the bike, literally.
I understand that these things happen in life and it does go on. (as many of my friends have said) I have taken time to myself to be depressed, to cry, and to wonder why? I have been told and see that I will NEVER know why. I do know that I didn’t do anything wrong. I do not mean that in a pompass way, but a secure way. I had given my ex all that I had of myself and more, she made me a better person I know and these are the cards that are dealt for now in my life. If I choose to keep dwelling on this time in my life, then my training will not prosper nor will my health. So that chapter is now closing and the new one begins. With rekindled friendships,greater apprication for unselfishness in others and a strengthend famaily.
I originally signed up for this race due to her support and her belief in me. At times these past few weeks, I’ve wondered if I could do this race anymore and if I really wanted too. But thinking it over (and a swift kick in the arse from my friend who could pass for an older sister never had) I realize that this race is not about someone and what they think, however what I think and believe in. Yes I’ll have my days when I ask myself why I signed up when I’m out on a long 20 mile run (in the dead of winter in Chicago) and a 100 mile plus bike ride (or the 4hrs on the trainer in the apt) But at the end of the day, I’ll be the only one doing the work, along with some crazy friends and a coach. And yes my family and some friends will be in Coeur D’Alene, Idaho to cheer me on and I look forward to that day, as their hands hurt from clapping so much :-) while my lungs and legs burn.
My friends, can’t be thanked enough for lending an ear and shoulder for me to lean on and picking me up when I was face down in the mud, it felt like. And some of you are saying, “no reason to thank us,”. You’re wrong, it all meant a ton! I was trying to be strong and thinking I was, but it was too tough; at times so will be this race and training I’m sure of that.. I’ll share those moments more openly then my love life; and you’re all happy for that.
Some good has come from all that has transpired. I was just 4 weeks from buying “the ring”, well now I don’t have to spend that money and can use it in other ways. Such as taking a trip (good time would be winter to the south for some bike rides) the purchase of a new bike maybe. I have also thought that I’d like to be one of those alumni to donate money to their school. However not enough to have the name of the library changed, not that I know where it is on campus anyway (just kidding mom). Yes I was a penny pincher as my friends and family had said to me; however it was with a purpose and goal. Now I can spend some of those pinched pennies on myself and some on others in need. My running is getting more aggressive too. Having lost a lot of weight (16lbs to be exact) I know it wasn’t healthy (Not like I was trying not to eat). That is why I knew my body; and training wouldn’t have helped, even as a distraction for all that was/is going on. Before gaining some of it back, which I’ve started to-do finally (3lbs). Since losing the weight my times have dropped by a ton. (1m.10sc per mile) and my mileage has improved too, maybe due to sleepless nights, restless legs, less weight to run with, and healthy aggression, but I’ve done a couple of 10k runs on average of 46minutes. So there is a silver lining to a dark cloud.
Now to stay healthy and smart in my training as it starts again. Not from where I left off, but from a new beginning. Harder to do then write I know, but the only thing I have to do!
To all my friends and family that have given an ear and shoulder, THANK YOU. You all mean much more then words and all those silly life phrases you’ve passed on, which are true. So: I’ve fallen off my bike. Once you fall off a bike, get back up and try again and again until you get it right. For now, I’m back on my bike, riding, training and eating more little by little. Baby steps, that’s all it’s going to take.
Until the next entry, I thank you for your time in reading this and your patience in waiting for me. The entries will be more humors and specific soon! I promise to add photos too.
Jon
I have learned that this race will mean more to me now as I will be taking a new journey with great friends and family along the way. I need to do this race for myself.
I understand that these things happen in life and it does go on. (as many of my friends have said) I have taken time to myself to be depressed, to cry, and to wonder why? I have been told and see that I will NEVER know why. I do know that I didn’t do anything wrong. I do not mean that in a pompass way, but a secure way. I had given my ex all that I had of myself and more, she made me a better person I know and these are the cards that are dealt for now in my life. If I choose to keep dwelling on this time in my life, then my training will not prosper nor will my health. So that chapter is now closing and the new one begins. With rekindled friendships,greater apprication for unselfishness in others and a strengthend famaily.
I originally signed up for this race due to her support and her belief in me. At times these past few weeks, I’ve wondered if I could do this race anymore and if I really wanted too. But thinking it over (and a swift kick in the arse from my friend who could pass for an older sister never had) I realize that this race is not about someone and what they think, however what I think and believe in. Yes I’ll have my days when I ask myself why I signed up when I’m out on a long 20 mile run (in the dead of winter in Chicago) and a 100 mile plus bike ride (or the 4hrs on the trainer in the apt) But at the end of the day, I’ll be the only one doing the work, along with some crazy friends and a coach. And yes my family and some friends will be in Coeur D’Alene, Idaho to cheer me on and I look forward to that day, as their hands hurt from clapping so much :-) while my lungs and legs burn.
My friends, can’t be thanked enough for lending an ear and shoulder for me to lean on and picking me up when I was face down in the mud, it felt like. And some of you are saying, “no reason to thank us,”. You’re wrong, it all meant a ton! I was trying to be strong and thinking I was, but it was too tough; at times so will be this race and training I’m sure of that.. I’ll share those moments more openly then my love life; and you’re all happy for that.
Some good has come from all that has transpired. I was just 4 weeks from buying “the ring”, well now I don’t have to spend that money and can use it in other ways. Such as taking a trip (good time would be winter to the south for some bike rides) the purchase of a new bike maybe. I have also thought that I’d like to be one of those alumni to donate money to their school. However not enough to have the name of the library changed, not that I know where it is on campus anyway (just kidding mom). Yes I was a penny pincher as my friends and family had said to me; however it was with a purpose and goal. Now I can spend some of those pinched pennies on myself and some on others in need. My running is getting more aggressive too. Having lost a lot of weight (16lbs to be exact) I know it wasn’t healthy (Not like I was trying not to eat). That is why I knew my body; and training wouldn’t have helped, even as a distraction for all that was/is going on. Before gaining some of it back, which I’ve started to-do finally (3lbs). Since losing the weight my times have dropped by a ton. (1m.10sc per mile) and my mileage has improved too, maybe due to sleepless nights, restless legs, less weight to run with, and healthy aggression, but I’ve done a couple of 10k runs on average of 46minutes. So there is a silver lining to a dark cloud.
Now to stay healthy and smart in my training as it starts again. Not from where I left off, but from a new beginning. Harder to do then write I know, but the only thing I have to do!
To all my friends and family that have given an ear and shoulder, THANK YOU. You all mean much more then words and all those silly life phrases you’ve passed on, which are true. So: I’ve fallen off my bike. Once you fall off a bike, get back up and try again and again until you get it right. For now, I’m back on my bike, riding, training and eating more little by little. Baby steps, that’s all it’s going to take.
Until the next entry, I thank you for your time in reading this and your patience in waiting for me. The entries will be more humors and specific soon! I promise to add photos too.
Jon
I have learned that this race will mean more to me now as I will be taking a new journey with great friends and family along the way. I need to do this race for myself.
posted by Jon at 9/13/2006 05:23:00 AM
3 comments
